Relief Pitcher; Sarah Palin

Barack Obama had himself a busy week.During which, he has managed to lie about the AIG bailout bonuses,along with his henchmen Dodd and Geitner;To call for all injured soldiers to pay for their own health care ,and last but not least;to insult people who compete in the Special Olympics. This is the Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces? He knew the the AIG bonuses were in the original contract and he knows that the main responsibility of a sitting president is to protect and defend this country and it's soldiers that give their lives toward this end. He goes on Jay Leno and makes fun of his bowling skills by deriding  Special Olympic competitors.This is the man who was touted to be smarter than George Bush?What nonsense.George Bush's school records have been released, Mr. President, how about yours? Of course I can readily understand why he won't release them. Anyone who thanks himself during a speech because his teleprompter told him to obviously ain't a rocket scientist. Hope and Change? Yeah; let's "Hope" we can "Change" Presidents real soon. I'm sure Sarah Palin is ready to step in at a moments notice.You know Pres. Obama, the crude hick who didn't have any experience? Except for running an entire state ,that is. Long live George Bush!!

Go ahead; make my Sunday!!

Should school cops carry guns? Is the Pope a Kraut? This is a no brainer.We send our children to these schools under the condition that they will be in a safe environment with instructors that will protect them. Not only should school cops carry guns; but the teachers should be armed too. These wackos know they are in "gun free" zones  and  feel secure in the knowledge that they can commit their brazen atrocities without fear of retaliation. And with the recent shooting of a Pastor during a church sermon in Illinois; I think the idea of arming our pastors, priests , and rabbi's is not only an option, but a necessity. Church should be a santuary of peace, in which people can commune with God , without fear of some lunatic pulling a stunt like this. Remember,they do it because they know there will be no retaliation. After all, it's church. Who arms themseves in church? Well I think it's high time that all clergymen take heed;pack some heat,and protect their parishoners .Remember, even Jesus instructed the Apostles to carry swords with them, during their travels into strange towns to heal people. Teachers and clergymen have a duty and an obligation to protect those whose lives have been intrusted to them; or to put it another way; "Go ahead punk, make my Sunday!!"

Obama , Following in the British Tradition

I find it surprising that Obama is showing such disdain for the British. He returns the bust of Churchill , and gives Prime Minister Gordon a gift  of movie DVD's which, in light of Gordon's gift of a pen set carved from the wood of a famous British battleship,proves the old adage that it's not the gift , but the thoughtlessness that counts. Actually' Obama should like the British; first, he seems bound and determined to emulate their tax system from the 1700's ; and secondly' his method of dealing with mideastern terrorists is similar to another Gordon; the British hero, General Charles Gordon. In 1883, the General  volunteered to be sent to Khartoum ,Sudan , where thousands of civilians were being threatened by Muslim fanatics; led by a man simply called the Mahdi. Like Obama, Gordon thinks he can walk on water and just say the magic words that will just melt the radical terrorists hearts and solve the problem . Like Obama, the General fails to understand that the Mahdi is following  Allah's will ,and therefore all the infidels within the city walls must be slaughtered in accordance with that will. The massacre was carried out and the great miracle worker Gordon died a hero's death trying to defend the beseiged city. A life sized bronzed statue of General Gordon on horseback still stands in England , a tribute to his courage , not to mention his arrogance and stupidity. Since Obama sent back the bust of Churchill , perhaps PrimeMinister Gordon should send him the statue of Gen. Gordon to replace it; since Obama seems determined to follow in the Generals footsteps, and he sure ain't no Chuchill, that's for sure. In fact,it may be the only way to save his God like image , as his presidency continues to fail under his spendulous " plan which is bankrupting the country. He could make that trip to the middle east to emulate Gordon , fall like a British hero, while trying to "reason" with Bin Laden in Afghanistan. Who knows? He might even get a bronze statue of himself out of it , maybe even on horseback! After all, never let it be said that we forget our heroes!

The Stimulus Bill for Dummies

Let me sum up ,in clear as crystal language,President Obama's simulus plan speech from the other night. "My fellow Americans, I intend to tax the rich corporate scum out of existence , which , of course will bankrupt the country, increase debt and force everyone on the dole of the few hard working taxpayers who somehow survive my plan. The increase in taxes on corporations will force small businesses to pay more for the goods that they use for their operations, thereby forcing them to lay off more employees and send their companies overseas, where low taxes make doing business profitable. This will, of course, create more unemployment, and even the jobs that my " stimulus plan" creates will be gone, since they are all " make work" jobs that do not produce anything, but simply create more tax burdens on the working man that must now pay the salary of someone building a bridge, or tennis court, or cleaning out a swamp to preserve some "swamp mouse" for Nancy Pelosi. But, my fellow Americans, there is a positive side to all this mess. You,the struggling, out of work citizen who prefers to sit on his couch, eating cheetos, and watching Oprah in the afternoon, will now be able to sleep soundly at night, because those rich, hateful, corporate fat cats that you spent so much of your life envying because they had more than you will now be reduced to your level. Yes, my fellow Americans, you will not be any better off than you are now, but at least you will have gotten revenge on the rich at last. Thank You, and God Bless the United States of America.  I'm Barack Obama and I approve this message.

From Racism to Tarzan; In one easy lesson

Eric Holder, our new Attorney General, has called the citizens of the U.S "racial cowards".Cowards Mr. Holder?You mean the cowards that fought and died in the revoulution to assure freedom for all men? Or the cowards that fought and died in the Civil War to bring about the end to slavery in our country; and then waged a political war to assure that the freed Black man would have the right to keep and bear arms to defend that freedom from those who would try to take it from them? You are the coward Mr. Holder.You hide behind non- existent race issues that this country bled to eliminate while you try to get the  Second Amendment repealed .The very Amendment that insured free men had the right to defend that freedom. Remember Mr. Holder ; you can't beat , bully or lynch an armed citizen.The Second Amendment truly made them free. Now, the second issue on the subject of racism; the cartoon depicting cops shooting a chimp was a comment on the stimulus bill and a crazy woman's pet that had to be shot, after it had mauled her unsuspecting friend .The key word here is Wild. This was a wild animal ; and as such should never have been living in this woman's house like a roomate.But as far as claiming racism in the cartoon,this is ridiculous. Nancy Pelosi and congress wrote the stimulous bill ,not Obama. If anyone should be insulted, it should be chimpanzees for being compared to  Pelosi and congress.  Now, as far as the killing of the chimp goes, all I have to say is; Why did it take so long?He should have been taken out much sooner , since he had attacked people previously. Remember the golden rule in owning animals; wild or domestic.If you can't take him in a fight,you should not have him as a pet. Even Mike Henry, who played Tarzan in several films in the late sixties,was attacked on set by a chimp that was playing the role of Tarzan's beloved Cheetah.Henry wound up suing the movie's producer , Sy Weintraub,and had to get plastic surgery to boot . The lesson here is simple;If Tarzan, the King of the Jungle and the Lord of the Apes can't handle a chimp,what chance do the rest of us have ? So heed the warning of Tarzan's dilemma and avoid making wild animals your pals.Otherwise, you'll wind up in a long court  battle ; either suing the owner of the creature that attacked you or getting sued by an angry actor in a loincloth for unsafe working conditions and physical injuries. Not to mention the possibility of being accused of racism somewhere along the way . Hey, there's a reason Tarzan carries a knife, and it ain't for shaving!

Instant Karma for Bush Bashers!

To those who continue to bash President Bush and call for him to be charged with war crimes ; It's over.Bush won twice. He got Saddam and sons and a whole lot of terrorists,and Iraq now has free elections and no more rape and torture rooms . Bush is retired on his  Texas ranch , and having a well deserved , good ol' fashioned home style BBQ to celebrate.You didn't get him. Get over it. But, it's not all that bleak, because you see, now it's our turn.Obama's President and now the fun begins.But, don't worry Bush bashers.We conservative Republicans will treat your President with the same amount of respect you showed ours.  So, as Bettie Davis once said; fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy ride! For liberals that is. And, with the appointment of a tax dodge as Secretary of the Treasury and a "Stimulus bill" designed to bankrupt the country;it may be a bumpy ride for all of us.

Everybody's gone waterboarding; Waterboarding USA!!

As President Elect Obama gets ready to take office,once again the issue of waterboarding has been brought up by Eric Holder; Obama's choice for Attorney General.In addition to being completely against the Second Amendment and our right to keep and bear arms; Mr. Holder also believes waterboarding is torture and that we should never use this technique under any circumstances even if it would save lives and prevent another terror attack. This attitude is, of course  non- sensical and absurd.Any person with half a brain will admit that if it was their family being threatened and their lives were at stake; of course you would torture to save them. Why then does this same issue not apply when it comes to protecting our country and its citizens in general?Sounds like a selfish attitude to me.Besides if any of these people against waterboarding would take the time to Google the procedure, they would see how tame it really is by torture standards.Let's face it ; the Spanish Inquistion would never adopt this technique. It's laughable by their standards.It does no physical or mental damageto the individual. It is however,very effective , and in the three times it has been used, it has saved lives. Waterboarding is so tame, in fact,that I would equate it to no more than typical frathouse hazing hijinks.And, as any ex- frathouse member will tell you,hazing works.It builds character.Besides,if torture of the enemy is so bad ,then why is the T.V show 24 so popular?That's what torture gets you.Jack Bauer is a hero who defends his country by torturing the enemy ,and has his own action figure.You don;t get your own action figure  by doing something bad do you? We tortured during WWII , and if you don't believe that then you are living in a fantasy world of marshmallow flowers and unicorns. As Pres. Bush said in his final address to the nation;"There will always be good and always be evil; and there can never be a compromise between the two.Evil must be destroyed .It's really as simple as that.And please forget the liberal concept that destroying evil makes you evil as well.That is nonsense . We kill to save lives and preserve freedom.They kill to appease their evil God ; who bids them to destroy infidels such as Christians and Jews. Besides, it's just a little waterboarding.Personally, I think they should take it up a notch, just to make it more fun for everyone involved. Maybe bring in Frankie Avalon in a bathing suit with his surfboard. He could sing a few tunes during the waterboarding.Maybe even some beach bunnies in bikinis and some sand ,just to give it that Beach Blanket Bingo feel. So on the subject of waterboarding; I have just two words; Cowabunga!, and Surfs Up!!